Privilege

One of the best posts I've read in 2016 was this:

http://www.upworthy.com/a-short-comic-gives-the-simplest-most-perfect-explanation-of-privilege-ive-ever-seen?c=ufb1

It almost sounds pretentious if I were to say that I've spent my entire life trying to understand privilege, because I haven't even turned 21 and 1/2 of my life thus far was basically me trying to get through puberty. So how is that even possible? But truth be told, I do feel like I've spent my entire life trying to pinpoint what it is exactly. From looking at the people around me and learning from them every other day, to appreciating it myself, to today. I'm still trying to understand it.

I remember when I was young I used to look at some of friends in envy whenever I see them possessing certain tangible items that I could never have owned then. Even as the years passed by and I grew older along the way, this phase did not actually go away. Once in a while I still experience the same thing. Even now. I've always wondered why even though we were ultimately rather similar people, we have vastly different experiences and we never got the same chances in life.

Tonight, I had an epiphany. I finally understood that ultimately, though people are all pretty similar wherever you go, we just don't all have the same chances in life. 

It all just makes complete sense to me now.

I always thought I understood that statement, but now I realise how much I did not understand it at all. Maybe in my head it was always, "Life is just unfair like that." Why? Because for the longest time, I thought life should be fair.

But you know what. Nothing in life is free, nothing in life comes easy. It's supposed to be this way. We work hard for what we want; with hard work, we achieve success. Some people have it easier, because of their backgrounds. Because wanting to achieve a taste of success means having to take control of our lives and work towards what we want to achieve, and although I've always believed that, tonight that belief has solidified.

That goes the same for love. Nothing worth having is ever easy. Relationships are hard work, but maybe love is, too. It's supposed to be this way. Because love is a choice, and while I've also always believed that, tonight, that belief has solidified. You can love someone, but you can dislike them on some days. You can love someone, and not feel happy on some days. You can love someone and feel disconnected from them. Love conquers all, but it shouldn't consume all the other equally important things that make up a relationship. Love is hard work because it needs these other things - constant reevaluating, constant communication, constant effort, the constant decision to choose it, to keep it alive.

But I digress.

There are many places I've dreamed of going from a young age but have never been to, and probably won't anytime soon. There are many things I've wanted to do from a long time ago but have never actually done it, and probably won't anytime soon. There are many tangible items I've wanted to have from a long time ago but have never gotten hold of them, and probably won't anytime soon.

I always thought that life is just not the same for everyone. And it's true.

Because while life may be better for some people compared to me, I often neglect the notion that someone may be having it worse than me.

Even with hard work and other factors (some of which are beyond our control), we may not achieve success, at least not so soon as compared to some others who may get there before we do.

What really captured my attention in the post was this:
"I'm not trying to say I'm against the idea that if we work hard, we succeed," he said. "I would like to think that is true, for the most part, but I just think people often forget or don't realise that our starting points, or our paths to success, aren't all even. Some people have to overcome more obstacles in the path to succeeding than others." That this isn't about anyone needing to feel bad or guilty for the privileges that they have, but rather it's about honesty and understanding - because maybe that's what could lead us to a better place.

Ditto. That alone answers it all. If everyone in the world appreciated what they have and didn't wallow in self-pity for what they can't have, wouldn't the world be a better place for all? I'm in no position to make this critical remark, because I'm guilty of being one of those people at certain points in my life. But tonight this post has impacted me tremendously (positively, of course) and now I just feel embarrassed for having been like that during those times when I did.

Whatever we have, we appreciate, even if we don't actually need it. Whatever we don't have, but need or want it, we work for it, through honest ways. Whatever we can't have, we just have to accept it, because at the end of the day life isn't the same for everyone and we just don't all have the same chances in life.

Privilege; a simple word packed with so much meaning. I finally understand.